HELP ! My child is a poor eater. What to do? Alice , Jakarta

Hi Alice ! When it comes to making a child eat, it's all about APPROACH. Many parents make the mistake of scolding, bribing, urging , pleading or even threatening a child to eat. This is not the right apporach as it makes mealtimes a battleground instead of a pleasant experience. Here's what to do
1) Small portions . Huge portions of food usually intimidate the child and turns him/her off food. As the child eats, gradually add more food to the plate
2) Find out what the child likes to eat and serve more of that. In the process , introduce other kinds of healthy food.
3) Be friendly and don't force the child.
4) Once your child is full, don't push anymore food .

Good luck!

QUOTE OF THE DAY

" The simplest toy, one which even the youngest child can operate , is called a grandparent"

Healthy food choices here

I read with great interest an article in New Strait Times dated 20March 2008. It said and i quote
" children had been brain washed into buying according to brands. This was evident in the "Kids Lunch Box Challenge " held to determine the effects of advertisements on children's food choices. Most of the children who took part in the challenge picked fast food and carbonated drinks instead of nutritious food and water.
" It was a kid's dream. And the kids went for it especially those (food) that came with toys.

Healthy food choices in the UK

I watched Jamie Oliver's show about bringing healthy food to schools in the UK with great fascination. It was truly a crusade because the children was so used to being served high fat,high sodium food that they shunned fruit,vegetables and healthy food and were adamant to eat what they wanted. And many of these children went home to busy mothers who themselves served the children the same unhealthy food. Oliver's message is clear : Children deserved healthy , nutritous food and should be weaned off their junk food diet. Their health is at stake!

New ways of learning?

A new study has shown that there are 4 types of ways children learn and pick up new concepts :

1) The Verbal Learner

This child has a flair for language and loves to read. The downside is ,he/she might be having difficulty in mathematics.

Approach : " As soon as your child learns something new, have her write it down and explain it out to you lould ," says Prof Mel Levine MD , Professor of Paediatrics at the North Caroline University.

2) The Visual Learner

This child responds to graphics and loves art. Tends to hing towards creativity

Approach :" The best way to teach a child like this is to use picture methods. Get books with a lot of graphics and diagrams inside " says Thomas Armstrong, Ph.D

3) The Auditory Learner

These children learn by listening. You may find them sitting in a corner, memorizing facts by repeating it to themselves our aloud.

Approach : Auditory learners understand new ideas best when they can listen to themselves say it. So if your child has already founds an effective way of doing this, leave them be

4) Kinesthetic Learner

This child can't sit still !

Approach : When your child is doing his homework, don't insist that he sits still. If he must fidget with something, give him an eraser to fiddle with. The controversial reason? In some kids, activity stimulates the child's brain and may help him concentrate.

STRANGER BEWARE!

In this time and age, it is IMPERATIVE that we teach our children to beware of strangers.
1) Don't open the door to anyone who is not familiar
2) Don't get into a strangers car
3) Be careful of people who claim to be "friends" and who was very friendly

Remember a lot of this predators who prey on children appear very friendly and diarming to children. A lot of them cook up fantastic stories and some of them may have been observing your child's movements or activities . So sit your child down tonight, and have a heart to heart chat about the danger of strangers.

Quote on teens

Charlotte Mason

The question is not,—how much does the youth know? when he has finished his education—but how much does he care?"

How to tell if your teenager is lying to you?

1) Body language and fidgeting
2) Concorting unbeleivable sotries or situations
3) A sudden change in routine
4) No eye contact
5) Or they look at you very long without blinking
6) The facts don't add up
7) They forget what they told you and try to cover it up with a new story

Role models for our teenage girls

There seems to be an alarming LACK of good role models for our teenage girls to idolise. So many girls nowadays are being force fed the notion that it's cool to be dumb and sexy ala Britney Spears or Paris Hilton. And you just need to look at Britney's downward spiral to see what a mess her life is in right now. Like the song " Stupid Girls" by Pink , who says in her lyrics " I don't want to be a stupid girl ......Outcast and girls with ambition, that's what i want to see ". I feel our society is in sore need of good female role models who contibute to society. And we should tell our children that it's not acceptable to use indecency to sell ourselves !

Oldest Nursery Rhyme?

"London bridge is falling down" may well be a thousand years old ! This nursery rhyme can be traced back all the way to the 11th century when London bridge, made originally out of wood actually was falling down due to the attack by King Olaf od Norway !

Quote of the day

" With kids, the days are long but the years are short "

Readers Digest

My teenage son is a mediocre student. Does this mean he will be mediocre his whole life? anonymous

Hi !! I know so many people who were labelled "hopeless" in school but later rose to great heights in their twenties and beyond. What many experts now believe is that how parents treat the child, motivate the child and set reasonable expectations for the child is more often contributary to the child's eventual success later in life. Allow the child to develop his or her own strengths in their own time.

MANAGING A TANTRUM

This is known as the 1-2-3- principle for tantrums
Explain to the child

1) Stop doing that because........
2)If you don't stop doing that, you must go to your room or wherever
3)Go to your rooom

Quote of the Day

"Good sleep can only be enjoyed if it has been interrupted"

Quote of the Day

" Ask your child what he wants for dinner only if he is buying "

FRAN LEBOBOWITZ

My 6 year old kicks up a big fuss every morning and refuses to go to Kindergarden. What do i do? Shirley, Sarawak

Hi Shirley.......School refusal is a common problem. First find out if there are any underlying issues e.g Is your child getting bullied by the other children? Or is it just a case of separation anxienty ? Slowly get the child to gain the trust of the teacher and tell her she approach the teacher anytime . Some parents even give a handphone to their child so the child can reach them at anytime. However, some parents say that giving a child a handphone is a bit much. Over a period of time, the child will gradually adjust so don't worry.

How do i get my child to be more independent? Sue Shah Alam

Hi Sue ! Many parents have a tough time letting go of their children and a lot of children tend to cling to their parents especially when it comes to sending the child off to the carer or day care centre.Ask your child what is troubling him/her. One way to deal with this is to encourage your child to speak her mind. Then explain to her the reason behind it example, mummy has to go to work. Also encourage her to do things for herself without interfering.

I am constantly comparing my naughty 3 yr old to his intelligent older brother.How else to make him behave? Anonymous

Hi! There is a tendency to discipline children by comparing them to sibblings or friends. Some Asian parents also "shame" their children into good behaviour. This obviously isn't healthy for the child. Self esteem develops rapidly in childhood and if the parents constantly put the child down, the child will develop an inferiority complex that he will carry into adulthood. When building a child's self esteem, you should focus on the internal factors eg the child's strengths not the external factors eg other children's strengths. For example, you can play the piano so well , not, Susie got a distinction in her piano exam and you merely passed.

I have a really tough time putting my toddler to sleep. Help ! Soh, Kota Marudu

Hi Soh! What u need to do is establish a bedtime routine for your toddler. Allow enough time in the evening for a relaxed dinner, warm bath and turn off the TV an hour before bedtime. Try to follow this same routine every night. Tuck in his teddy/favorite blanket with him and read him a bedtime story. Sing a special song together or hum his favorite tune. Do the same ritual every night. I cannot stress enough the importance of rituals for toddlers and children. When you leave his bedroom, be decisive. Do not linger.

Hi my child eats his veggies at the day care but he refuses to touch it at home. Why? Shanti, KL

Hi Shanti....Children sometimes use food as a tool to gain attention. His acting up at home may be another way to gain extra attention from you. When so much emotion is attached to not eating his food, he naturally rebels . As a parent, it is important to not make a big fuss when he refuses his veggies . Also , do not bribe or threaten your child to eat his veggies. This will only reinforce his negative feelings about it. Interestingly, he may be eating his veggies at the day care due to peer pressure (all his friends are eating it) or the fact that he can't gain extra attention there.